Ecclesiastes 7:10
“Do not say, ‘Why were the old days better than these?’ For it is not wise to ask such questions.”
One tradition that we have been able to maintain pretty well despite the pandemic is what our family calls “pizza picnic”. The name comes from the way the tradition started, back when we had an apartment with a normal-sized living room. On family movie night, we would make our own pizza and then move the coffee table and spread a blanket on the living room floor to eat pizza while watching a movie. In our RV, there isn’t floor space so it isn’t really a picnic anymore, and making our own pizza is a little more complicated in our little kitchen, so we’ve switched to frozen pizzas. But the name is the same and we enjoy this time together about once a week.
Recently, many of the movies we’ve chosen to watch together have been childhood classic that Staffan and I loved as kids. My latest choice: Bedknobs and Broomsticks. As the opening credits rolled and the music began, I found myself a little teary-eyed as I hummed along. Scene followed scene, long-forgotten and yet still so familiar. I was surprised by how emotional I was while watching. Old memories mixed with the new ones forming: of my 3-year-old jumping up and down and laughing, his face covered with pizza sauce, the older two trying to learn the magic words that brought everything to life. It was a happy family moment that was also steeped in nostalgia.
Nostalgia is a tricky thing. It is wonderful, but sometimes sad, to revisit treasured memories and to replay moments with loved ones, especially those who we no longer have with us. Even if we’re not flipping through old photos to seek it out, nostalgia can sneak up on us in a familiar scent or the notes of a song.
It has been fun to watch these old movies and talk about life before the internet and cell phones and Instant Pots. In many ways, it seems like a simpler time. But in other ways, it seems much more complicated. That is because both are true.
Most of the changes that come with time are neither good nor bad. They are simply different. Or perhaps it would be more accurate to say that they are often a healthy mix of good and bad, so that it is possible to see them either way, depending on which side you choose to look at. Cell phones are not always great for teenagers, but neither was sitting on the bench outside my middle school for an hour wondering if my mom got the “let it ring twice then hang up” signal I sent from the pay phone.
Change seems to happen faster and faster, and 2020 will probably spark long-term changes that we haven’t even realized yet. I’ve read theories that shaking hands will disappear as a polite gesture of greeting. Some cities are brainstorming ways to re-imagine their methods of law enforcement. Churches have created online worship opportunities that they are likely to continue even after the crisis has passed and we return to corporate worship in person. If any or all of these things have you wringing your hands with anxiety, wondering “what’s happening in this world,” it’s time to pause. Ask yourself what fears are causing this reaction, and if it was truly better “before” or if it’s simply uncomfortable because it’s new and different. What is at the root of these fears? I’m not suggesting there is no cause for concern, but simply that it is very important that we check our gut reactions and unrecognized fears.
These fears can be used to divide and weaken us. We can’t avoid confronting them and wrestling with them. In this election year, politicians will work hard to convince us that it was better before and who we should blame for it being worse now. Churches will face conflict over whether or not online services should be continued and how this new trend affects things like baptism and communion in their particular theological traditions.
We tend to see the past through tinted glasses. Our minds naturally filter out harsh details and painful moments. In most memories, negative emotions are diminished and positive amplified. This is as it should be. It’s beautiful to look back and focus on the good things, learning from the hard things without getting stuck in those negative feelings. It is healthy and necessary to filter the past this way. But it can also become dangerous if it leads us to try to return to that rosy, well-filtered time (which never really existed) rather than living in the present and planning for the future.
Wisdom allows us to treasure our memories while also remembering that time only moves in one direction. We do not have to live in fear of change or fear of the future. And as long as we can maintain this perspective, we can watch old movies and enjoy nostalgia to our hearts’ content.
Be First to Comment